My room

Without any intention, i was wandering around in my photo folder. These days people no longer holding the bulky album on their hand. It is just a mouse-click away from the photo.

I found this.



The first thing i wanted to say was the mattress and the comforter. yeah you are right, is a Digimon comforter. my 21st birthday present, the best and most practical present i ever had in my life. from the day i was 21 until TODAY...the days i weren't sleep with Digimon were either i was stay overnight somewhere, or someone else is stay overnight. even was washing it, it will be back in duty right after it dried. and normally it will not last through the night. i will make sure i have it before i sleep. It ranked as my all time best present. Dun give me a damn souvenir or something funny man. give me comforter or something can eat. sleep and eat is important. haha.

It was my first room after graduated, Mae's room is just opposite but the house belongs to her sister, which room is opposite too. (damn :P) Checked on the date of the shot, it was 9-august-04. I remember vividly it was the 2nd day i moved in. Which explained why it is so clean too, haha. I was temporarily stay in ej's room in Sheares hall before that. until school re-open. i mean, until i moved out to Mae's place.

side-track a bit, when i stay in ej's room, you dun want to believe on that period the room is packed with the stuff of 7 people. is either we were all minimalist, or Sheares hall room is damn big. ya, is really like that.everything on the photo is mine, except 2 things. can you tell which? one is quite obvious, the other is a bit hard.



On the other side, it was a writing table provided by Mae's sister. and my pc already take up most of the space. and having painfully close distant with the LCD. and I'm glad is LCD....if it is CRT the monitor screen will pushed right in front of my face. and supposed to be my working space. and ended up as space for anything. anything also put on it. from food to files to handphone to coins to letters to anything.... you name it.



To be frank. it used to be like a show room....table. Diligently clean up every single piece of paper as well as every single dot of dust my finger can ever feel.



.....it only lasted for a week. afterall, look at my hostel room and you will understand.

Welcome to B317.

就这样，

星期六中午打电话给五婶告诉她我妈在路上，下午到。

星期天晚上又打电话给五婶。欲言又止那样。其实我是不知道从何说起。

假假闲话家常一下，说到正题。一说开就无法停止，结果讲了两个小时多的长途电话。

难怪昨天打来。五婶说。

唉，怎么可能不知道我妈几点去她家呢。那通电话明显多余。根本就是有话要跟她讲。

厘清了事情，我更加肯定新年会更好。

五叔在旁边说，如果是跟女朋友讲两个小时，大概很快可以喝喜酒。

我觉得两小时还很远哪，讲不了两分钟才会更快喝喜酒吧。

......为什么每个人都在看几时到我??

情不自禁

今天YY生日，去吃晚饭。看了一场无聊电影。连生日快乐都没说。就心照吧，付帐都懒得拉拉扯扯了。

友情就是要享受无聊耗日子才会滋长。我们的日子已经太紧绷，朋友见面都是要只作伴，不说话。

不是什么分享心事的，不过要个朋友作伴而已。

要求如此简单其实很难做到。我们心里都明白。

我有很多已经见家长的朋友，多到我妈都不记得，每次带回家都要介绍，讲了又讲。她只记得那些中学的。那些朋友会的。看到朋友会三个字，大概很多人会叹好久没有听见了吧。都是年少无知，对友情没有安全感又缺乏自信心才会制造出这种玩意儿的。

我没有不屑紧握这种牵拌，也没有如获至宝地供奉。接下来几年都是那样。没有刻意雕琢，就让它自然生长。象鱼在水中游，没有想要握着身边每一寸的水，朋友才会细水长流。

我说，无论那个阶段，小学，中学，中六，大学。

你们都是我情不自禁的骄傲。

谢谢祁洁

昨天yc一提到我妈，我竟然骤然泪如雨下，太丢脸了。还好周围的人都出去了，不然人家还会以为我们关系紧张。

在完全没有心理准备的情况下，我的眼泪稀里哗啦如洪水，完全不受控制，连我自己都吓到了。一点防卫都没有，眼堤彻底失守，简直就象泛滥成灾。我不知道为什么，也没有办法解释。到现在我还是无法接受在人前稀里哗啦的事实，还不是在我认可的人面前。我甚至忘了上次这样是几时。

都是祁洁。那天她说得太赤裸了。话白得我没法下咽，吞下也无法消化。难怪这几天心里总是象憋着一股气无处释放，还带过年来挨到昨天。

我不知道为什么，只觉得压力很大，也充满了无力感，心里好难过。负荷过剩，又大部份不是自己的事，却在情在理无法置之不理，总象什么都自己背负，也不忍心要弟弟们分担。

不过托祁洁的福，在情绪上我现在感觉好象非常轻松。都跟着眼泪流出来了吧。

谢谢祁洁，新年见吧。

后记(9-1-08): 我其实没有哭的感觉。只是纯粹的渲泄而已。对，我还是没能接受。

2008

今年的唯一的愿望是，希望比去年更好。

二零零七真不是一个让我喜欢的年头。

回顾一下整年的博客，要么我生性爱埋怨，再不就是流年不利。影响最大的发生在我家里。不想再回顾了，太疲，也没有什么教训值得吸取的地方。健康普遍不好，食物中毒，皮肤病，感冒，甲状腺发炎；财运中等，可是花费倍增，还好有点投资；爱情只有不痛不痒的涟漪，不值一提；事业还好，只是到了交叉口却还下不定决心。

唯一的好是我依然人事已尽。

今年我要谢谢的人依序是五婶，文心，伟棋，cm，ej，世君，富升，小凌和鲁豫。

都是一些和我分担或分享的人。或启发我的人。

再见二零零七。

二零零八计划。要吃早餐。准时午餐。一星期不准吃麦当劳超过两次。星期天最少三小时写文章或练水彩。跑步最少每星期5km。每个星期一上午最少读一篇论文。每个月储蓄最少六百。最少每两星期打电话回家一次。

还想写每天一点前睡觉。我知道做不到。算了，那是明年的目标。