Thursday, December 30, 2004

2005.

Summary: very busy (lazy) to write for the past 10 days.

ok, and the summary explain all.

it is getting on track, my research is on its pace now, i'm happy with it.

ok....then christmas eve, went to the lab for half day and everyone seems not in the working mood at all....that half days seems to me like 4 hrs of presents exchange session, hahahaha....and i didn't prepare any, but got a lot from them!!haha....

hmm, and ya again, yes, again, and I was there when someone cried. jy seems tired with it. he better do the right things from now on. and this jy who is one third of the golden triangle is now the only left over that still available, ahhaha, congrate cm and tw!! no more flirting for the other two huh, else hehe.....jy the-left-over-hotprop then being invited again....

initially Cy, jy and i were planned to just have a simple dinner at holland V, then YR suddenly invited her for countdown at orchard. i insisted not to join the crowd....too bad a girl in bad mood wasn't rejectable....suxx, how shitty me...where is my backbone???! so i went to look for my backbone at orchard, darn. whole night jy was stuck to cb, then Cy and i were 'observing' from behind....hahahah, darn funny cos there was someone keep silence for the whole night....hahaha. of course black face...who asked jy was holding cb's shirt all the time..all the time Ooo...:P

so 5 of us walked like an idiot at orchard. and tt jy showed her manipulation skill again.....of course i knew her, so don't even bother to care, so do Cy who was just laugh at her....then cb and YR both extremely worry cos the girl dun talk to them liao worr....i heck, cos i found my backbone, haha. and cb seems interested (attarcted or whatever)....asked me what to do..woohoo, like God huh, i told him : "if you can't settle this now, you are not going to settle in the future"....woah, like very smart hahahahah. sux,why i laugh so much....

kla, then met siewmee and sam at orchard, then finished and go home. went back to hall and looked for kayu. fantastic kayu and xy, nice cheese cake and salad for me:P it was nice....and she showed me what dinner they have for xmas eve, they cooked themselves.... oh man, tts MUCH MUCH MUCH better than what i ate at the somerset just now!! i feel like eating the salmon now...lol

yea and tts it for the eve, din go anywhere for chiristmas, went to former company's boss home for xmas party. then badminton again with jaron and Cy.....so energetic...concuss after tt ahhaha....

and monday is a good day, YC annouced there will be a PI (principal investigator) treat on the 1st week of 2005!! yay...LG suggested we shld go for jap food at tangling mall....haha let see what ck says when she back from her holiday. and YC discussed with me about plan in the near future,i guess now i'm quite safe until 31 march 2006....and i willing to take YC as my supervisor if one day i'm running for master degree. aih,....really a good news for me too...finally YC got the grant!! she got funded!!! congrate to her and to myself...:)

and now waiting for 2005 to come. wish me all the best, it is going to be a better year.

p/s. shucks....this is an ultimate gossip entirely....:P how kpo can i be..

Saturday, October 30, 2004

I read your diary, KS.

"路經一個報攤﹐你看到了一份雜誌。我的天呀﹐那個當TIMES封面的不是你以前大學的同學嗎﹖天啊﹐短短十年﹐他就當上了十大最佳CEO! 喲﹗那個以前去德國念科學的同學﹐竟然有份被提名選諾貝爾獎。。。"

.....我們同步出發﹐但他們已走到那麼遠了

.....如果我當初多努力﹐會不會跟他們一樣﹖

.....那﹐不就是現在嗎﹖你已從十年後回來了。你是否應該好好把握今天﹖

.....說的是﹐十年﹐二十年﹐甚至三十年後﹐你回頭看﹐你的人生中﹐會有後悔嗎﹖會有一些你知道你該做﹐但沒做到的﹖

.....人生終要有點遺憾才會美。對﹐但not in this context.

"要青春無悔。別讓歲月留白。"


KS, i read your diary.

I can't stop myself for posting this in my blog. you are still the one i know.

life changes, and we all grown up. your words brought me some faces that i hardly forgot, though i seldom have them in mind either. I wonder where are they now, what are they doing now, how are they doing now... while I'm still here hanging around to look for something.

Inspiration is temporary, still I'm inspired. determination and conviction is what i need. i always tell myself to be humble and identify the fact that I'm just as ordinary. yet every extraordinary dream begins from an ordinary mind, and there is the place to begin with. There were so much ppl besides ourselves are so bright and talented last time, or now, they must be gone that far.

I feel so thankful for never being the number one in the past among these faces, so that i can tell myself i'm not good enough and push myself even harder. Everyone knows there is only one champion, but the true champion will have to compete with himself. In the past, I weren't the outstanding one especially when we stand side by side. But there is one thing I'm so sure I came this far for factors that deserves me to be here. Yesterday I'm looking at their back, but I'll appear on par for today, tomorrow, next month, next year, and the next 10 yrs. May be I'll show them my back too.

I've decided my path for being an "artistic scientist", heh, I like this title so much. i do enjoy what i'm doing, there is so much of things that happened and ppl that keep me going. to be frank, there were many times in the past, the persons that push me forward are friends, and I can easily picked up some word or line, even unintentionally, to inspire myself through them. Even now, I'm inspired by your diary, KS, but again i have to think this seriously..... I need to tell myself instead of waiting for ppl to tell me what to do. I just have to repeat this again, determination and conviction is what i need now.

by now, I know what I can do and what i should do; i have chosen the latter. and i want to hold this tight: "I'd tried my best" is not enough, I have to success in what I should do.

One day you'll see my name somewhere, and i'll make you proud.

I'm ordinary.

but my dream is not.

Sunday, October 24, 2004

Wedding...

Went back to KL for my cousin's wedding, was a superb trip. really nice to see all of my cousins and ppl.

Reached KL on Friday evening 6pm sth, then have my dinner with fs at KFC near Pudu. Damn, actually not suppose to have dinner at this kind of place...really not a good choice for having fast food, but was caught in the rain and fs only got the bike, sigh.

There were so many ppl in my uncle's house. 1st child's wedding ma...my generation 1st wedding...wasn't the reason for being so grand la, but just happened that everyone looking forward to our generation...we were all grown up.

After the wedding dinner I was seriously thinking how if it was my wedding...(duh, so gian to get married huh..:P) that was super troublesome. I told my mum and my aunty, haha, when my turn comes, I'll just disappear with my wife have honey moon at somewhere, and having a simple former dinner with family and direct relatives ONLY. Then just get the 1st page of the paper to inform the world "Hi, I married her". Prob this is to compensate the "public recognition" and "ceremony" to inform the relatives : yes she is my wife.

I guess sometimes there are ppl that come to my wedding (if there is any) whose i dun even know who are they, prob my mum's frens or what. sigh. that's so hard and troublesome even just thinking of marriage, what for i spent so much time thinking of it huh???

This is so troublesome.

P/S oh ya, my PC cant start after i came back from KL, duno if my HDD got prob or power supply or the mother board.

Sunday, October 3, 2004

where is my privacy...

This is not the first time that happened. I know someone went in my room when I wasn't around.

There was a day I put all my clothes on a chair, unfolded cos no time yet (lazy....), let it be there for a few days already, not really good for that so planning to get it done on the night after i came back. when i went in my room i saw my clothes were all over the bed and the chair was taken out to the drawing room already.

There was a day I was running a program, it took about few hours to finish, I let it run for overnight but unfortunately it was incomplete when I'm about to go for work in the morning...so I just let it runs by itself. When I came back the pc was shut down.

There was a day I was downloading some anime using P2P....it din finish overnight too so I let it running until I came back from work in the evening. The was pc shut down again.

When i 1st came in actually I have try my best to switch over all the "bad" habit adapted in the hostel....eg. left the light open overnight for nth, left the pc running all the time for nth etc. I remind myself all the time to fit in ppl's living style cos i do not have the right to abuse all the electricity and water as in NUS (aiks, what the hell....ahhaha). so even i now i go to the toilet for a bathe or hving a meal in the kitchen, i switch my pc and the light off all together. afterall i'm just renting a room under ppl's roof. at first i did exhibit some of the bad habits but i was getting better now....

aih, but yet again, can you just inform me in the evening when i came back if you want to take the chair from my room? and especially I did put "sth" on it!!! I switch on the pc when i need it and i switch it off when i don't need it, regardless i'm around or away. luckily i was just downloading some anime which may not that important? luckily i was just running a program and not restoring the OS??

the most amusing thing is when i was asked "you switch off my comp? i was running something just now"....i get some funny answer which i don't really understand what's that. i doubt there is anyone that can understand. so if u think i forget to switch off, cant you just say u think i forget so u help me to switch off? if u dun like i left it open when i wasn't ard even it is in use, can't u just tell me straight?? and i do not keep the pc open for nothing k....yet, again, I do not have the right to stop you to go into my room, and to check every single thing to see if i follow the house rules. my bottom line is just, keep me inform and respect my privacy only....

Oh ya, may be it took a month to repair the lock on my door. and i dun think my door lock will be fixed for the coming few months either...so i stay in a room that cannot lock, and the house is not GUYS only...sigh, I dun mind my door can't lock if my privacy is bring respected...i dun want to repeat it again and again....i just want my privacy......:(

and the door lock!:P

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p/s Thanks sm for your concern, i'm meeting stephnie next next week to find out if anything she can do for me.

p/s Ah-derr to cm....I locked my door in the hall when I "want to / have to" lock it k....:s

Monday, September 27, 2004

To start over new....

This is a phrase i learn from a song " The Reason"... Have been used it several times in my MSN nick, hehe.

The old online diary OD was hacked some days ago, and everything was gone, can't wait for them to recover....i have a lot to tell. so, the OD i should just leave it now i guess.....so i started a new one here...

I'd give up my job in Science Park, now working in special histopathology lab in NUH, under department of pathology in NUS. err, to be more precise, I'm registered under department of ENT (otolaryngology) with a Principal Investigator (PI) Dr Wang, and attached to another PI Dr Lim in pathology. So probably I'll running between NUH and CRC, cos Dr Wang's lab is in CRC.....Anyway, guess i'm simply lucky, and probably my luck bank is close to exhausted by now.... Chance wouldn't granted for twice i guess.....

My lab officer is a girl from KL, oh ya, the laboratory is floated with Malaysian, mostly from KL, only my supervisor Dr Lim and I are from Ipoh. Hmm...they are nice ppl anyway, tell me a lot of gossip in the lab and the toilet, hahahahaha...(how the hell is 'nice' going to do with 'gossip' ?!?! and about toilet!!) There are 2 PhD students in my lab (but always away for some thesis thing, the other one overseas), 1 research fellow from SGH (always away also), 1 UROPS student from Bioengineering, lab officer and I.

Though I have a project of pathogenesis of nasal polys, now still at the stage of learning lot of basic lab technics. been practicing cell count for last week (count until eye blur), and autoclaving, mixing own solution and medium, and just culture my own cell today. so excited, hahaha, like having own kids. their name is Raji and MCF7, Raji is suspension and MCF7 is adheren....this one are adopted. before I can have my own kid, i better make sure they grow pretty well, round and sound. My own kid most probably is endothelial cell that characterized closer to MCF7 because it also adheren cell. (some cell need to stick to sth to grow --> adheren cell) Later on must learn how to do cryostat sectioning, paraffin blocking, H & E staining and immunostaining.

Just some thought come to my mind, laboratory can really be glamorous. Sometimes, the experiment can be tedious, some may be boring, or time consuming. Despite there are lot of frustration in it, i guess there may just a process for us to learn how to appreciate a lot of things. Kayu told me some days before, biologist requires an attribute called "observant". I like this word. That's the beginning of an appreciation, i think.

Been celebrating cm and tw's belated birthday on sunday. called some canadian pizza, I eat 4 pieces and dabao 4 pieces, hahahaha, finished for today breakfast. I'm getting into trouble, my tummy can afford to stretch to the limit that i can never think of it before....wasting money man, I never gain a single ounce. no offence ya ladies...:P, my tummy is just simply demanding.......

I feel tired everyday even now i switched my job. But i feel so full everyday going back home, though sometimes i may have my own dinner, or own lunch. i have so much of friends in the hall and off the hall that i can think of, whose make me happy everytime i meet up with them, just lot of laugh and jokes. sometimes share some secrets, or k-po some gossip, haha, and outing for a dinner, or having badminton, or play some pool.....